I hope everyone has a good Thanksgiving Day and enjoys the company of friends and family. Speaking of family I want to share this with all of you here at Montana Netroots. Many of you know I am still suffering from the effects of Agent Orange and Cancer but this is almost nothing when compared to my brother’s daughter. Please feel free to email her and thanks for your prayers and comments.
Melissa Erickson used to dread the running. She was a big girl, a 6-foot-3 center, and tears would come to her eyes when former Huskies basketball coach June Daugherty pushed her body farther than she thought possible.
Oh, if only to feel that friendly pain again. Erickson is 29 now and her body aches once more, but for a far different reason. She’d give anything to be able to trudge through those old workouts, back when life and her legs were taken for granted.
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Former UW basketball player Melissa Erickson, 29, shown at Cal Anderson Park near her home on Capitol Hill, is suffering from muscular degeneration in her legs that has been difficult to diagnose. One doctor believes she has ALS and gave her 10 years to live. |
When she tells friends her goal now is to run a half-marathon if she regains her health, they chuckle. Not because it seems unlikely that someone in an apparent fight with Lou Gehrig’s disease could journey 13 miles, but because it’s such an ironic carrot for the easy-going Erickson.
But nothing’s easy anymore.
Not walking around outside her Capitol Hill condo, where even the slightest upgrade makes footing treacherous for a young woman who already needs braces to support legs she says feel like cement.
Not standing in the bathroom, when the failure to set herself properly sometimes results in her balance giving way and leading to the awkward truth of a once-powerful athlete suddenly trying to un-turtle herself from the cold linoleum floor.
Not approaching each day with the wonder if that first doctor’s diagnosis of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis was correct and that she really does have only 10 years to live.
Her current physician, a Virginia Mason neurologist, believes she suffers from progressive muscular atrophy, a cousin of ALS since the illness hasn’t yet invaded her respiratory system and upper limbs. But Erickson continues searching.
Maybe the naturopath has it right, that she’s suffering from Lyme disease, which would be more treatable and thus provide more hope for recovery. Or the other naturopath, since discarded, who tried convincing her she’d been infected by a parasite while playing basketball overseas.
Sometimes Erickson just wants a name attached permanently to her problem so she can put the questions to rest. Sometimes she hates that any label is required, as if that really makes a difference. And sometimes she just acknowledges it probably is ALS, even while taking an assortment of foul-tasting concoctions and vitamins designed to rid her body of toxins that might fit with Lyme.
“I feel like I’m fighting shadows,” said Erickson, now working as a counselor at Echo Glen youth facility in Snoqualmie. “I get pulled this way and then they tell me something else. Just tell me what it is and let me do whatever it takes.”
Even if it’s the worst-case scenario?
“It’s a conundrum, but I think at this point I wouldn’t even care,” she said. “When I was told I had 10 years, I don’t think it can get any worse than that. But just when you think that, maybe it could.
“That was the lowest for me, but it’ll be a year this month I was told that. I’m sure the day will come up and I’ll be, hmm, I wonder if I do have nine years left now?”
She’s far too young to fret about that ticking clock. Far too fun to face this sort of pain. Far too strong to feel so vulnerable.
Friends and former UW teammates have rallied to her cause, helping form a Melissa Erickson Foundation (melissaerickson.org) that will hold a fundraiser Saturday night at Jabu’s Pub in Seattle from 5 p.m. to 2 a.m., with a portion of all food and drink sales helping pay for medical treatment and support.
She’s happy for the help, but humbled at the same time. She hopes any extra money received eventually can be turned over to another cause once she gets better herself because, well, to think anything else would be giving in to a disease she’s not ready to fully adopt.
This all seems too sudden for a young woman who was playing professional basketball in Portugal just three years ago, when she first started noticing weakness in her legs.
At the time, Erickson figured she must be getting older and needed to train harder. Instead, she discovered after returning to the U.S. that something was attacking the muscles in her lower body.
Her hidden foe slowly stole her ability to play basketball, her lifelong crutch. Now she’s to the point where walking is difficult and going to the gym too painful for a whole different reason.
“I hate the reminder of what I once was,” she said.
But as the body weakens, the mind adapts. Perspectives shift. Focuses change.
“It’s made me think about each day as one day,” Erickson said. “Not one week or one year. Just each day. And I definitely don’t care what people think about me any more. I value my family and relationships so much now. Friendships are my medicine. They’re what heals me.”
In college, she was the Husky who often butted heads with authority. As a member of Daugherty’s first UW recruiting class in 1997, she was the one who didn’t work quite as hard, didn’t study quite as much, didn’t worry about staying out a little late.
“She was the one always getting into a little trouble,” said teammate Sarah Duncan, now an Everett attorney. “It was good trouble, not bad. You could always rely on Mo for a good laugh. She did well in school, but the rest of us were nerds, brainiacs, and Mo had more of a social life.
“I always enjoyed her as a teammate and we were close, but now as she’s going through this, we’ve grown to a maturity level where we love each other. It’s amazing how the whole class has pulled together.”
When Erickson was first given 10 years to live, she collapsed on her bed in an apartment she then shared with former teammate Kirsten Brockman, older sister of UW men’s standout Jon Brockman.
It was a rugged first year of acceptance and denial; the fight both physical and mental.
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Melissa Erickson calls for a loose ball recovered by Huskies teammate LeAnne Sheets in a 2001 home game against USC. |
“Kirsten has always been a person with such positive strength,” Erickson said. “Whenever the devil in the back of my head was saying, ‘Give up, it’s hopeless,’ I had her as my angel on the other shoulder saying, ‘You are not a quitter. You’ve never quit before. Don’t quit now.’
“I’ve got lots of angels around me.”
Her mom and dad recently moved to Duvall from their longtime home in Colorado. Her older sister works at Echo Glen with her. Teammates and friends keep her going, even though she no longer parties like old times because alcohol slows her already-sluggish body.
She admits to slipping toward depression at times, but a two-week treatment program at Sanoviv Medical Institute in Mexico in September bolstered her outlook. Duncan, her pragmatic former teammate, said Erickson tended to get down on herself as an athlete, but has been much more positive as a patient.
“I think I’d have broken down a long time ago and said I can’t take this,” Duncan said. “I’ve never seen that with Mo. This has been a real gut check for her and she’s handling it better than anybody I can imagine.”
Erickson, who missed much of her senior seasons both in high school and college with knee injuries, draws on her athletic background for strength. She remembers playing basketball, trailing by 15 points, but knowing a couple of buckets, a forced turnover or two and suddenly momentum has shifted back.
She’s looking for that positive flow now, hoping that good days will lead to more. Thinking the chiropractic treatments and naturopathic medicines might ignite a breakthrough. Figuring there’s nothing to lose when the alternative is watching your body slowly give way.
But reality is harsh and Erickson finds herself accepting things now that seemed intolerable before, like the handicapped-parking pass in her car and the need to lean on friends for comfort and care.
She falls more now, losing balance and pride at the worst possible times.
“I feel like one of those ladies with the beeper on saying, ‘I’ve fallen and I can’t get up,’ ” she said with a wry laugh. “It’s been such a humbling experience. Being as independent as I always have been and now always having to ask for help? It sucks.
“This has definitely been a teeter-totter of a battle that I never, ever thought I’d have in my life. It left me in shock, the normal ‘why me?’ and “what’s going on?’ stuff. There are no answers for that.
“But you know what?” she said. “I’ve always thought there are miracles out there. And I think I’m going to get one of them.”
If she does, there’s a half-marathon in her future. But regardless, Melissa Erickson has come to one realization.
For her, life now is about putting one foot ahead of the other. One step at a time. Surrounded by friends to help catch her if she falls.
HOW TO HELP
WHAT: Melissa Erickson fundraiser; a percentage of proceeds from food and drink purchases goes to the Melissa Erickson Foundation.
WHEN/WHERE: Saturday, 5 p.m.-2 a.m., Jabu’s Pub, Lower Queen Anne, 174 Roy St., Seattle
ALSO: Donations accepted at Melissa Erickson Foundation, c/o Sarah Duncan, Adams, Johnson & Duncan, Inc., 3128 Colby Ave., Everett WA 98201, or visit melissaerickson.org